Lord, Where Are You?

Do you ever get the feeling that you are all alone? Do you ever question whether or not God is with you, even though you know that He is? Do you ever think about the future and instead of feeling optimistic, feel something akin to apathy?

That’s how I feel right now. I feel very “blah.”

I woke up this morning extremely tired. I worked from home for a few hours, drank lots of coffee, ate lunch, and was still tired. I tried my best to get some chores done this afternoon. I went to the grocery store, cleaned up a bit, and paid bills. I even took the dog for a walk. But I never seemed to get that jolt of energy I was seeking.

The Hubby came home, we took some pics outside of the pretty trees and flowers, and I ate dinner. And now I’m writing…with the hope that I can regain my creativity and optimism.

It’s a struggle. Each day is a struggle. But I have so much to be grateful for…I KNOW that I do! I haven’t been doing very well with keeping my gratitude list, so maybe that’s part of the reason why I’m feeling this way. I need to maintain a thankful heart.

So let me think of some things I have to be grateful for: the smell of the air after a rain shower. A nice time with family for Easter. That our handbell choir played well at church. Hot running water to take a shower. Air conditioning to keep us cool in the house. A good walk with Daisy. Bringing my Honey home safely from work.

Wow, when you start to think about it, there really ARE a lot of things to be grateful for. 🙂 You just have to take the time to acknowledge them. And I already feel like my spirit is lifting a little.

I must keep focusing on the positives, on the endless number of things I have to be thankful for. Yes, the depression and anxiety pull me down…but by relying on God’s help I can find a ruby in the rubble.

So where is the Lord when I can’t feel His presence? He is as close as can be. He is with me, He is in me, He is beside me…and He will never leave. ❤

Photo Credit: Aaron Burden

 

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4 thoughts on “Lord, Where Are You?

  1. Hi Crystal, while I don’t struggle with mental illness, I woke up today feeling down. I just couldn’t pull myself up out of the funk. I greeted my coworker who is also a believer and we commiserated that we were just dragging all day. Seems like it’s been raining for 8 years straight here in Oregon. I pray the Lord will give us new strength tomorrow. I am so grateful for hope and the joy His awesome presence gives us. I’ll be praying for you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Hannah, Thank you very much for reading and for sharing! It definitely is difficult when we feel low and have little energy. It’s almost like trying to climb out of a pit. But you’re right, by relying on God we can find new strength, along with hope for a better day tomorrow. I really appreciate your prayers, and I will keep you in prayer as well. ❤

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  2. Right, we have to learn to acknowledge the things we are to be grateful for and maintain a thankful heart. We have to choose to see beauty instead of the ugliness that dims our vision of hope and optimism. With the things you mentioned, I can feel how blessed you are Crystal.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Jayson! Yes, focusing on the positive and the beauty around us can really help with our perspective. And you’re right, I am truly blessed by God – I just need to choose to believe this fact every day.

      Liked by 1 person

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